The fears I have
I was talking with a friend recently about the fears that I have as a father and as a man. Its not really something simple that we talk about all the time (as men or just people in general). We joke about death by using items like bucket lists to really talk about the things we want to get done before we’re gone. Josh (@DadStreet) and I talked about a bit of this on LateNightParents this week, when we talked about the Jackie O recordings and what we’d leave behind for our children (I’ll pick this point up again later).
I know by this point you are already thinking its time to click to a different site – something shinny and happy… you’re also thinking WTF adam I read dadarocks for the light stuff the funny the good – as I said months ago – I’m going to try to balance – so stick with me on this one.
If you’re not a close personal friend or been around the few and far between tweets – I had a bit of a scare last year, I had a heart attack. Yup, no history of issues… typical guy I avoided doctors unless there was something wrong. Everything was just like what the TV shows say it will be like – a crushing feeling on your chest and some arm pain. Fast forward 8 months the pain is gone…. but there is something new that I never really had before is the fear of what if I did die, what if I have another heart attack tomorrow (no one knows).
Add to that the typical family man stuff of making a living, enjoying my family, balancing work/life, juggling family/friends – now add to this the fear of what if.
I really dont know – I try to live for today – I’ve been trying to push away all the fears. Yah I have issues I know… I get that. I also get that I’m not letting this fear cripple me, but I do want to plan for something – just incase. All the legal stuff is good to go (wills, insurance, ect) but what about a message to the loved ones (this is what Josh and I were talking about) I have had on my to do list to create some videos for my wife and child should I go the way of the dinosaur and I really wonder how other deal? if others plan? do you write journals? do some recordings?